Locations/Showings
Featuring Mainstream &
Art House Choices

Forum
Scary Movie 3 was neither scary nor a movie. Discuss this & more.

Reviews
Glorifications & Executions of the latest Movies, DVDs, and television shows.

Flashback Flicks
Krull and other "Lost" Classics get their day in the sun.

Crapmasterpieces
So darn crappy they're hilariously brilliant.

TV Highlights
Boob Tube Playtime!

Calendar
A movie/tv related calendar. Covers openings, DVD release dates, conventions etc.

Honey DVD

Starring: Jessica Alba, Lil' Romeo, Mekhi Phifer, Zachary Williams, Missy Elliott
Director: Bille Woodruff

Honey: Sweet And Far Too Syrupy
Jessica Alba shakes her groove thang, and no one gets stirred.

Reviewed by Kevin Cunningham

The Pitch: A girl from the projects dreams of becoming a big time dancer and choreographer, and wants to use it to help the neighborhood kids stay away from drugs and the thug life. In other words: Flashdance gone hip hop, with dashes of Boyz In The Hood and The Barbershop.

It's movies like this that make me cry. Not because of the obvious and driven home sentimentality of this film, but because of Jessica Alba's career path.

Jessica Alba had done a very good job of rising up the Hollywood career road. Beginning her career with background parts in Camp Nowhere and Disney fodder like P.U.N.K.S., and memorable supporting parts in Idle Hands and Never Been Kissed, she'd gotten her big break starring in Dark Angel. Jessica was the "It" girl of the 21st Century. Three short years later, Dark Angel got cancelled after a terrible sophomore season, the one movie she took time off to film went straight to video (The Sleeping Dictionary), and every ounce of heat she once had has gone.

And after all this, she has landed in Honey. It isn't really as bad as it seems. It's written as if it should be a blatantly promotional star vehicle for someone along the lines of Beyonce Knowles. Having Miss Alba in the lead role gives the film slightly more legitimacy. It's the perfect role for her, as she's playing the exact same character she's done since Dark Angel; very sassy with a touch of sensitivity. The good news is she is very good in the role, and obviously applied herself. Her dancing is better than anything I've seen in most hip hop videos in the last year, and she's sporting the hottest abs seen since Janet Jackson was in her "That's The Way Love Goes" stage. Unfortunately, she's the bright spot in this film, surrounded almost by as many singers as other actors (though only Lil Romeo shows up repeatedly. He's no actor, not yet).

Outside of Miss Alba, this film delves into the cliches of both dance and hip hop films. On one side, the struggle of the young, inexperienced dancer fighting through numerous obstacles but still staying true to herself is what we've seen in every movie from Flashdance to Save The Last Dance. (I'm hoping that Jessica Alba's hair was a tribute to Jennifer Beals from Flashdance. I can't think of any other reason for it.) And the hip hop cliches fly through this movie, particularly standing on the multiple appearances by various hip hop stars moonlighting for the free publicity. Ginuwine, Jadakiss, Sheek, Rodney Jerkins, and even Missy Elliot appear for mere moments at a time. For good measure, Blaque shows up during the credits to get in their own appearance. It doesn't help.

And it certainly isn't helped by the hip-hop mentality this film takes. Even though the film is centered around dancing, it's still treated by the filmmakers the way good art is treated by the Upper East Side of New York City: it's something noticed for a good ten seconds at a time, and then forgotten. The editing minimizes all the dance sequences before the big finale to quick clips, just like music videos do today. In the end, it eliminates any appreciation we could have for a beautiful dance form. The truth is, the hip hop community would do well to take the advice of the film's underlying moral, "Keep it Real." Hip hop hasn't been keeping it real since the early 90's, and now rivals 80's hair rock in the element of pointless style and glitz.

In the end, it's not really the fault of the performers in miscast roles that this film stays flat; it's the surpriseless script. When the biggest laugh the audience gets is the over exposed line of Missy Elliot saying "You need to call MC Hammer, and let him know you're still in his stuff" that was seen in the trailer plastered everywhere, you know the script is missing something. The main storyline is everything you saw in the trailer. The subplot involving the neighborhood kids is everything you've seen before in other movies. And the dialogue is too busy explaining the hip dialogue to us to actually use it right. Please, I may be a white boy, and the only hood I've got going on is on a sweatshirt, but I don't need the phrase "Ducking like a Bobblehead" demonstrated to me for 15 seconds on screen, especially if we just saw it anyways.

The one other actor who makes any kind of impression in this film is Mekhi Pfifer in his nice guy role, but even his spot is bland. He plays the kid who got out of the hood by, believe it or not, owning a barbershop. Missy obviously forgot to tell Mekhi to get out of Ice Cube's stuff.

Overall, Honey is not a terrible movie, it's just a terrible cliche. Still, what can be salvaged from it is by a young actress who may just not be too late to salvage her career.

Rating: (2 out of 4 stars)

Want to discuss this, and other topics, with fellow fans?

Post your thoughts in the SJ Fanboy Forum now!