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Spider-Man 2
With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility

Starring: Tobey Maguire, Kirsten Dunst, James Franco, Alfred Molina, Rosemary Harris, J.K. Simmons, Donna Murphy, Daniel Gillies, Dylan Baker, Bill Nunn
Director: Sam Raimi

Reviewed by Chris Ching

Critics are united in overwhelming praise for Spider-Man 2. Better than the first movie, deepens the series in the way X-Men 2 wonderfully expanded on its own predecessor, the best super hero film ever made - all these superlatives and more have been used to describe this summer's most anticipated blockbuster.

In the words of Mr. Hand, Ridgemont High US History Teacher, "WHAT ARE YOU, PEOPLE? ON DOPE?"

Spider-Man 2 is a fun time at the movies, but it's hardly the end all, be all of comic book films. I think critics are so jazzed because it offers the kind of real human emotion that is virtually non existent amongst the Daredevils and Punishers of the world. Yet, that's like jumping for joy simply because the drive thru guy at McDonalds slipped some Grey Poupon into your extra value meal. And it wasn't like the first Spider-Man didn't have its share of convincing human drama.

As with fellow summer sequel Shrek 2, the story is similar to the first; nice scientist becomes insane bad scientist and Spider-Man has to stop him. Instead of the Green Goblin, it's Dr. Otto Octavius whose fusion experiment permanently grafts a set of powerful metal tentacles to his body.

Of course, the self styled Dr. Octopus has an "evil" plot, but you'll quickly forget exactly what it is because Spider-Man 2 focuses almost entirely on Peter Parker and the toll being a super hero takes on his life. It isn't pretty. He gets fired from his job as a pizza boy, he's failing school, and J. Jonah Jameson and the Daily Bugle call him a menace. Worst of all, his reservoirs of web fluid are running dry. Impotence subtext aside, if there's anything Tobey Maguire excels at it's "lovable put upon guy", and he continues to be the franchise's MVP. He's "real" in a way Ben Affleck as Daredevil could never be; his eyes alone convey an amazing range of emotions. But the sign on the door says Spider-Man, and I was expecting a lot more action than this movie ultimately delivered.

"Oh puhleazze Kirsten... that Jake guy is a total wuss!"

Even more damaging is Spider-Man 2's respected yet foolhardy embrace of comic book conventions. Traditional comic book style relies on exaggeration in both look (muscle riddled bodies) and writing (Face Front True Believers!). On page, a screaming fat guy with four writhing metallic appendages works; on screen it looks rather silly (Yes, even sillier than the first Spider-Man movie's Wal-Mart bought Green Goblin mask). The same can be said for Peter Parker's inner monologues, his bizarre Mary Tyler Moore strut through New York, Uncle Ben "back" from the grave, and unfortunately quite a few other revolting scenes and hammy performances (I'm talking to you James Franco!).

On the more positive side, the CGI that made Spidey look like a cartoon last time around has enormously improved and not one time did I picture some animator fiddling with his mouse. Also while I felt there was an overall lack of action, the runaway train scene is the best action sequence in either Spider-Man movie. Comics book aficionados even get a smattering of fanboy fun: Alex Ross' illustrations during the opening credits, a right armless Curt Connors, and a reference to Dr. Strange. There's even a "Go Get Him Tiger" compliments of Mary Jane.

"I shall goose you with impunity and alarm!"

Despite my qualms, I recommend spending your hard earned money on Spider-Man 2. I mean c'mon, what else are you going to see... White Chicks?

Rating:

(2 out of 4 stars)

You think Spider-Man got roughed up by Dr. Octopus in Spider-Man 2?

Almost twenty years before The Passion of the Christ, Marvel Comics sadistically tortured and crucified their own blue and red messiah. Spidey's punishment at the hands of villain Kulan Gath was so brutal he actually croaked in the last few pages of Uncanny X-Men #191. Luckily for Aunt May's fragile heart, the circumstances that brought about her nephew's demise were reversed and Spider-Man rose from the grave... so to speak.

This was just one of the many grisly scenes in a gripping 1984 X-Men story arc by Chris Claremont and John Romita Jr. running through issues #190 and #191. Kulan Gath, a reincarnated centuries old demon sorcerer, gives New York City a Dungeons and Dragons makeover. Not only is the cityscape transformed, but all of its inhabitants (including super heroes) are likewise changed into extras from Conan the Barbarian. No one remembers their true selves although previous relationships remain; the X-Men and the Avengers are still bands of warriors. As his power grows stronger, Kulan Gath readies to widen his master spell to engulf the entire world - a world he of course will rule.

Kuley previously tried to pull the same trick in Marvel Team-Up #79 (scripted also by Claremont), but was defeated by Spider-Man and Red Sonja. To insure his plans don't crumble for a second time, the sorcerer marks for death Spidey, Dr. Strange, the X-Men, and anyone else who might step in his way. Kulan Gath definitely gets props for torturing skills: he splices Professor Xavier with the Morlock Caliban and turns Doc Strange into ribbon like flesh. The worst is saved for Spider-Man - or "Man-Spider" - as Kulan Gath refers to him. Never before or since have I ever seen the Web Spinner so methodically f**ked over by a baddie.

In fact our heroes go through the proverbial ringer in their quest to save the world: Colossus and a Kulan Gath possessed Vision spontaneously combust each other in their clash of titans, Rogue is impaled with a broad sword, and the Wasp is turned into a soul devouring harpie! All this death and destruction made for one one of the most compelling X-men story arc's ever.

Of course, good triumphed over evil in the end, and Dr. Strange with the help of New Mutant Magik used Kulan Gath's own spell to turn time back on itself as if nothing had ever happened. As usual only the heroes themselves knew that the X-Men had once again saved a world who hates and fears them.

These issues arrived during the height of Chris Claremont's 80s success and popularity as X-Scribe while artist John Romita Jr. was finally stepping out of the shadow of his comic legend pop John Sr. to be recognized in his own right. Aside from the all time classic Claremont-John Byrne run, I'd venture Claremont and Romita Jr. were the quintessential X-Men creative team. It's not a coincidence that the last X-Men story to feature the two was Uncanny X-Men #211 where Wolvie and the Gang were decimated by the Marauders. After Romita jumped ship, the comic was never quite the same again.

***Uncanny X-Men #190 & 191 will be included in Essential X-Men coming out this month.

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